00:00:09.870 - 00:00:36.330

Good morning, everyone, the Lord be with you . Let us return to our seats. Liturgy is crowd control once more. My name is Margaret Amour and I am the academic dean and the first Presbyterian

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Church, Shreveport D Thomas and Professor of New Testament Studies here at Austin Presbyterian Theological Seminary. Welcome back to the second of our Jones lectures. Before we begin. If you have been paying any attention to

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the news, you know that it has been a very difficult time, particularly for Asian communities in California the last couple of days. And so before we begin, Dr Kim has asked that we take a

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moment of silence just to remember all of those who have been killed in the last couple of days in the shooting deaths in California. God of the nation's spare us yet. Lest we forget lest, we

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forget Amen. So I'm happy to bring back to the stage. The Reverend Dr Grace Kim for her second and final Jones lecture. Thank you so much for the introduction and thank you so much for coming

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back. You know, you never know if they're gonna come back and hear you for the second lecture . So thank you so much and believe it or not, I'm very nervous and I was trying to

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figure out why I am so nervous and because I usually don't get this nervous. And it's because for a long time because I grew up in Canada and I came to the U S, I felt like

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Presbyterians, PC USA didn't know who I was. So nobody really invited me. And so I've been invited by the United Methodist. I spoke at M T S O, I spoke at Drew, I

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spoke at all these places and um Methodist conferences, etcetera and then the Episcopalians and some other groups, the Baptist. So last year, I was like , going, why are no Presbyterians inviting me?

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And then President Jose calls me and invites me. So I was like, oh, this is wonderful . And then now I'm gonna speak at Princeton too . So now I'm like, really nervous. Now

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, if Presbyterians start knowing who I am, they may not like me. So that's a likability thing . But anyway, I'm so happy to be here . I've been so welcomed by the president, the

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faculty and the staff and I got to meet some of you um yesterday and the day before and it's wonderful. I feel like we're just getting into this and we need a few more days, you know

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, don't we? So President Jose, you need to extend it like a few more days because I just feel like I'm getting to know you now, that would be a nightmare right now. If you

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give me an advance notice, I can do the third lecture. But as I got to know you , I realized that many of you are ministers and some of you are from near and some of you

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are from far away. So I'm so grateful that you have come to this Midwinter lectures. I know you're not just here to see me. Um, you know, Dr Bill and Dr areas, they

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were so wonderful. I'm just learning so much from them. So, as I got to know that many of your ministers and many of your chaplains, my heart goes out to you because it's not easy

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being a pastor of a church. You know, they think you don't do anything all week, right ? Until Sunday morning. It's much like professors to , they think we do nothing until we get into

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class. Um, I shared, I had the three kids, they're older now, but when my youngest was about eight years old, he was doing this Hopkins summer program. So I dropped him off

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at eight in the morning and I picked him at , at nine at night. Yeah, it was great for me. So, all day. So he tells me in the morning mom, I need

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a pair of shorts. I said it was a residential, but we were local. So we, you know, dropped him off at breakfast and picked him up at night. So he said mom,

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I need a pair of shorts. So I said no problem. I picked him up at night and he said, mom, did you get my shorts ? I said no, I was so busy and

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he looks up at me. He goes, what did you do all day? But that's how I feel about what, you know, what many of us do. So, my heart goes out to

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you because I know it's so much work preparing for your sermons and midweek meetings and visitations and there's a million other things that you're all doing. So I'm so grateful that you took time away from all that

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to come here. So thank you for those who have come this morning and yesterday and the day before . So thank you. So I am also happy . Um I was doing a lot of the book

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signing and everyone was getting reimagining spirit. I'm happy about that, but I wasn't really here to talk about that and I thought nobody's buying invisible and that's what I'm here for. So I know the book

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person is at the back so you can get it and I'll be happy to sign books. Oh, yeah, you're right here. Okay, in the bright and the beautiful pink shirt. So um so

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because I'm hoping that it will be a lens for you to understand some of the things that are happening to those who have been marginalized in our society. So I've got some slides. So you know,

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to go back the, I love this cover and , you know, we basically have no say in it authors, they just give you a bunch of samples and, you know, I had to choose

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between two and they were both very interesting. But my niece who's an artist said, oh, Auntie Grace, the other one looks a little, it was a side profile of an Asian woman. But

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she said, I think it kind of looks like Elvis Presley. So I had to go with this one because after she said that I just couldn't get Elvis off my cover. But I've come to really

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love this because it's such a unique one. It's not a thing like any of my other covers. So that's how I came to settle on this cover . And many people ask me, you know,

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why is it called Invisible? There's a few Asian Asian Americans sitting here and I know I don't need to ask them because for many of us, it's a common experience. So I never have to explain

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why it's called Invisible. So that's one reason because it's a common experience. The 2nd 1 is at the beginning, not at the beginning, but at the beginning of my writing career, I had all

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these long titles and I just couldn't remember I have a bad time with names of people, but I couldn't remember the title of my book. So I said it's either going to be one or two words

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going forth. So invisible was a good short one word that I can remember and it captures the experience of Asian Americans. So that that's another reason why I came up with Invisible. So as I shared

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a bit yesterday about experiences of racism, we have been made invisible within this culture. So I shared yesterday about how racism is talked about in these binary terms, white and black. So if we're not

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in the White camp or the Black camp, then you kind of become invisible, your issues, your experiences aren't that important. So in many ways, we become invisible in our experiences of racism and discrimination

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are eliminated from our experiences from our lives. That's why I wanted to share some of the Asian American history. And I'm sure some of you knew some of it, but you may have not known all

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of it. And I think remembering our past, our experiences of racism discrimination, xenophobia, marginalization, discrimination helps us today to understand where Asian Americans are and where other people are um who also are um

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discrimination, um discriminated and marginalized and also made invisible . And for me, invisibility is also a theological concept and it helps us to understand the dynamics of human interaction. Okay, how we interact with one

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another, with our neighbor, our coworkers, our church members, you know, with Presbyterians, we have our session and our deacons. So how we interact. So it's a societal issue and a spiritual

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issue. So for me almost my whole life. When I think about my experiences of racism, I always just thought it was a societal issue. Until recently I realized it's a very theological issue too.

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You know, when I was growing up, I grew up in this small town London, Ontario, which is about 2.5 hours. Okay. So some of, you know, okay. Yeah. He

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, this minister, I can't remember your name now . Jack. him and I are now connected because I shared with that story about Allentown and the poor United United um Airlines woman who couldn't pronounce Allentown.

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Anyway, Fred. No, Jack was the minister of the first Presbyterian Church of Allentown. So we are connected. Yes. Um So London Ontario is a small little town outside of Toronto. And I

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used, you know, people used to ask me what I was and I would say I'm Korean and this is like an elementary school and the kids would say there's no such thing as Korean. So then

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I thought maybe my mom made it up. So I went home and I said, are we Korean ? And my mom said you're Korean. And I said kids at school said there's no Korean. They

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all said there's Chinese and there's Japanese but no Korean . And then later in life, I found out in Hawaii, some people thought that when a Japanese married a Chinese, their offspring were Koreans. But

00:13:01.450 - 00:13:15.960

anyway, Korea is a country. So, you know, for a long time. I, I didn't know like people were making fun of me. They called me names. So for a long time

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, I was confused of who I am and my mother assured me that I am um Korean. And there is such a thing as Korean. So it's a theological issue of spiritual issues. So what happens

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to the invisible? And it's not just Asian Americans . I'm just sharing it because of my own personal experiences of becoming and being made invisible. So not only are we seen in our society, but also

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our voices are drowned out or ignored. How many times people have said, you know, I have nothing to learn from a woman or an Asian American woman. You will be surprised but it happens.

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So thank you, President Jose for inviting me to share because it happens to women like me and other women of color. We've got nothing important to say . There's nothing that we can say that is more

00:14:28.740 - 00:14:50.390

important or relevant than a man who is teaching or preaching or sharing or lecturing the loss of Asian American women's individual and communal voices is a detriment to our society and to the church. You know, the

00:14:50.390 - 00:15:11.390

church is huge When we broke out in our small groups. Yesterday, I was telling our group 60% of the world or who Asians, we are the dominant group. But here in the us, we

00:15:11.390 - 00:15:31.360

are only seven but our voices get drowned out or ignored. We become irrelevant. Nobody wants to hear what we have to say because it's not important. That's what happens when you become invisible. We are

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pushed to the margins and made invisible. I cries of racism discrimination, xenophobia get overlooked. It's not important. So we lack power and agency in our society. That's why I'm grateful for ft whereas,

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yeah, you know, they have special programs for um scholars of color or students of color because it is difficult for us. You know, I had such a hard time in my phd program and groups

00:16:11.640 - 00:16:30.300

like FTE helped me because there are so few resources for us. So as I struggled, you know , I wrote the book and it was interesting um hearing Dr Bill yesterday, you know, when he

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was sharing about his book was a book of Water and then of something else and something else and then it became that book. So mine was, I was ranting and I was so angry about everything and

00:16:42.890 - 00:16:56.360

everyone that was doing something bad towards me, right ? So I was writing about it and I thought , well, I cannot end like the whole book cannot be negative, right? Because then no one

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wants to read it, right? So I thought I have to come up with something that is positive that is going to be helpful, especially for those in the church and in the wider society, you

00:17:11.700 - 00:17:26.230

know, how can I come up with the theology ? That is helpful for those who are being made invisible. It's not like I want to be invisible , but those who are pushed into the margins and

00:17:26.230 - 00:17:41.670

made invisible. And there's many of us Asian American and particularly Asian American women are one group, but there are many other groups and you are aware of it. Many denominations don't accept full inclusion. And

00:17:41.670 - 00:18:00.580

even if we do, you know, even where I am in Pennsylvania, so many churches have divided and broken away so many arguments and fights. Last fall, I got invited to speak at my alma

00:18:00.580 - 00:18:15.020

mater. That was one thing I kept complaining about why isn't my alma mater inviting me and then they invite me and I'm scared to death to speak to them. But while I was there, I grew

00:18:15.020 - 00:18:34.300

up Presbyterian Church in Canada. And now my memory is getting a little confused. I forget if they accepted full inclusion recently or they're about to. But many, especially the ethnic churches are now leaving PCC

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and it's so heartbreaking. You know, there are so many groups that are made invisible, their voices are not heard or drowned out. So it was really heartbreaking for me that PCC Presbyterian Church in Canada

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is really, really small. Like when I compared to PC USA, like we're really tiny PCC and now it's gonna be even smaller because people cannot accept the full full inclusion. So I had to come

00:19:08.630 - 00:19:19.720

up with something. So I came up with four key Asian concepts. Okay. And some of you may already know these concepts which will be good, but maybe some of you, it's, it's brand

00:19:19.720 - 00:19:34.330

new. So I will go over these four concepts because I find them so helpful. So the first one is our or our Korean word is Judy. See, I grew up so I was born in

00:19:34.330 - 00:19:48.920

Korea. But when we immigrated to Canada, I , my parents took me kicking and screaming to Korean language school. I hated it so much. I said I would never do this if I become a

00:19:48.920 - 00:20:06.710

mom. Well, when my kids were born, all three of them literally kicking and screaming in the car, they were holding the door like this saying , they're not going to Korean school and I dragged

00:20:06.710 - 00:20:21.710

them to Korean school. But you see now it's all so helpful because now I can use my Korean to do my theology. So Odie is one, the second term is Han and I shared that a

00:20:21.710 - 00:20:34.650

bit yesterday. So I'll say a bit more about Han The 3rd is Chung and then the fourth is key. And I feel like everybody in this group because everybody was buying reimagining spirit that everybody is,

00:20:34.660 - 00:20:48.230

is interested in the spirit. I may spend a bit more time on the spirit. But I, you know, as a Presbyterian people always interview me , why you're writing about the spirit because no Presbyterians

00:20:48.230 - 00:21:03.850

are concerned about the spirit, right? Because we are so orderly. We are so, you know , yesterday in the morning, when we had the music and he, you know that professor, it

00:21:03.850 - 00:21:14.830

was so good. And he said this is really great practice for our worship at the, at the evening. He said that, right? You said that this, I just felt at home because this

00:21:14.830 - 00:21:29.940

is so Presbyterian, right? We gotta practice ahead of time for him that we were saying at worship because we are so orderly. So I just felt at home because when I was at Knox College in

00:21:29.940 - 00:21:41.340

Miami, that's exactly what the professor of music did all the time. We had to practice ahead of time. We're not performing, but we had to do it. So I just felt so much at

00:21:41.340 - 00:21:55.340

home. So thank you to the Professor of Music and Worship. Okay. So this first term Judy and I know we have some Korean sitting here. So it's all review for you. But it will

00:21:55.340 - 00:22:07.940

all make sense why I chose these foreign terms. So in the West where I grew up, I'm always so messed up because I'm always living in between these cultures. But we are very individualistic. We

00:22:07.940 - 00:22:21.740

use I for everything, right? Because if you don't say I in a sentence, it makes no sense, right? I always have to say I am going to Austin Texas, right? I'm going

00:22:21.740 - 00:22:36.740

to Austin Seminary while is in the Korean language, you can just get rid of the eye and you can say going to Texas and we understand what you are saying or who you are talking about because the

00:22:36.750 - 00:22:52.060

eye is not that important. It's a communal society . That's why yesterday I was talking about eating the , what was I saying? Hospitality? I forgot to say and because I kind of mentioned and everybody

00:22:52.060 - 00:23:03.430

was laughing and I forgot to say how important. So when we sat around on the floor without chairs , if more people came, it's, it's okay . You just squeeze and sit this way. You

00:23:03.430 - 00:23:17.500

know, you don't have to all face the table because the community is so important. So OD is important and I think other cultures, the African culture , some South American cultures, the hour is very

00:23:17.500 - 00:23:36.130

, very important. It's we that is more important than the eye. So this is the the ugliness because language is so so important because that's all we have to do theology when I was raising kids.

00:23:36.140 - 00:23:51.260

I think the hardest thing and I think all the mothers and the fathers will agree is toilet training, right? So I live in Pennsylvania. My family's in Toronto, we're gonna go um not a bus

00:23:51.260 - 00:24:03.180

tour, we're just going to visit. And so when my youngest was being toilet trained, you know , that was the hardest everything. It's just every child is difficult, but the youngest. So you

00:24:03.180 - 00:24:19.460

train them, we're not gonna drink much in the car. So we're like 20 minutes in, it's gonna be 92 plus whatever hours because of how many stops he calls out mom, I have to go

00:24:21.440 - 00:24:36.180

, we're in a minivan. So he's in the back row. I'm in the front passenger and I said what he says, I have to go. And then I yelled out, I said, hold

00:24:36.180 - 00:25:00.610

it and he's like what? And then the two middle kids are telling him, hold it and then he yells back, hold what? So language is important, you know words matter. So yeah,

00:25:00.620 - 00:25:17.870

now you see language and mothers all know what we're talking about. So language is so important. So I think understanding theologically and in the church, our nous or we will change how we understand each other

00:25:17.870 - 00:25:33.350

and God. So woody is a very important concept . Um So yeah, when we are, you know, another example of fury is, you know , I don't in Korean, we don't say my

00:25:33.350 - 00:25:56.860

family. What do we say our family? We don't say my seminary. What do we say? We don't say my husband, what do we say ? The correct term? Believe it or not is

00:25:56.870 - 00:26:14.230

our husband. So even we were not practicing polygamy , but the correct term is our husband even though you're married to one. Okay. And we don't say our my kid, we always say our kid

00:26:15.020 - 00:26:33.410

. So this moodiness is very, very important. So, you know, within Christianity, I think if we can move away from the me or the eye to our or us, it really prioritizes inclusion

00:26:33.420 - 00:26:52.800

and care of all people because we're working towards a theology of visibility. Okay, we are made invisible and we want to work towards a theology of invisibility . It forces us to look at community, the

00:26:52.800 - 00:27:11.980

body of Christ and the communion of saints. So I think living in this culture of moodiness, it really alters our understanding of God. And I thought with Professor Beales, think comment about God and God's

00:27:11.990 - 00:27:37.720

in the Bible, that was really interesting, you know, the plural understanding. Um We, I think living in this culture of our nous really will really challenge our theology, challenge our understanding of being

00:27:37.730 - 00:27:55.560

a church, being a seminary, being a community of faith. Okay. So the second term is Han. So I mentioned it yesterday because people were asking me during the Q and A. So we

00:27:55.570 - 00:28:15.420

all know suffering. But when there are systems set up to cause suffering, then that is unjust suffering systems such as racism systems such as patriarchy, you know, end of um you know, when we

00:28:15.430 - 00:28:37.850

understand um gender or gender identity, there are these structures that are set up to marginalize or make the other group suffer. So we call that unjust suffering . It's like the piercing of the heart and Koreans

00:28:37.860 - 00:28:53.290

because we're a small country, a little peninsula. We were either invaded by Korea, by Japan or China or some other foreign country. So as a nation, collectively, we can experience Han. So

00:28:53.290 - 00:29:14.110

you can experience it individually and you can experience it collectively, this wounded nous of the heart. Okay . That really is so deep. Okay. The systems of racism and patriarchy, colonialism. And I

00:29:14.110 - 00:29:27.770

would, you know, many of us or at least for me, because I do um eco theology , you know, it's not just human beings that experience han, the earth is experiencing hon, right

00:29:27.780 - 00:29:45.340

? That's why we get all these storms, you know, the frequency of the storms and you know how extreme these storms are because the earth is crying out. I think we have to be careful.

00:29:45.350 - 00:30:00.090

And I think with dualism because we've separated everything, we cannot see God in creation. That has been a big problem for us Christians in the western world , other religions have no problem. Many of the

00:30:00.090 - 00:30:21.940

other world religions have no problem. But for Christians , we have a problem with this. So when we understand Han, it really opens up a deeper understanding of the spirit and it is really the spirit

00:30:21.950 - 00:30:44.910

, the spirit of God that seeks to liberate us from this feeling of Han and oppression, James Cone , Dr James Cone. When he visited Korea and the alone Jin's were trying to tell them about what

00:30:44.910 - 00:31:03.490

Han means. He said, oh, African Americans have a similar term in a similar concept. He said, when we talk about the blues, that is us talking about the Han. So we have

00:31:03.500 - 00:31:19.610

different groups and different cultures, different ethnicities, they have their own terms, you have your own. Yeah. Lucha, lucha. Yeah, la lucha Han blues, you know these different terms and words

00:31:19.620 - 00:31:41.340

only help us to widen our understanding of our world and about God. So the fourth, the third term is um Chung. So we Koreans love to talk about Chung all the time. Okay. And

00:31:41.340 - 00:31:56.510

Chong is this um it permeates our culture. It is uh you know, these words are always difficult to translate into the English language. But for Chong , I would say uh a love that is inseparable

00:31:57.960 - 00:32:09.060

. So you can stick your hand in a jar of honey and it's so sticky, right? You can't get that honey off your fingers. All right , you get a napkin and it just makes it

00:32:09.060 - 00:32:35.450

worse, right? It's a sticky kind of love between us, between individuals and it can be between communities. So um includes the term Chong includes um terms like affection, attachment, compassion, kindness,

00:32:35.460 - 00:32:55.040

um sharing connections, sympathy. So it tries to capture the essence of love. I think in the Western world as Christians, we have a God pay Phileo and arrows add Chong to it. Okay.

00:32:55.050 - 00:33:15.090

Because the more words you have, you know that your mind will expand because words are important. Languages are so important. And you know, Chong can also be tied to this understanding of the spirit that

00:33:15.090 - 00:33:31.350

reminds us that we are also connected to our creator or to our God. You know the scriptures, talk about this. You know, we cannot be separated from the love of God. So that's this

00:33:31.360 - 00:33:52.570

understanding of Chung. We cannot live alone. Although many days I want to be alone when I was younger. Um The best thing you know, when you have kids running around is just locking yourself in

00:33:52.570 - 00:34:06.030

the bathroom. When I had something delicious to eat , my mother would bring it to me and said , don't share it with your kids because our motherly instinct is to share it with the kids, right

00:34:06.580 - 00:34:20.940

? You eat it. So the only place you can eat it without the kids bothering you is running to the bathroom. So that's what I would do . But so we want to be alone but we

00:34:20.940 - 00:34:44.540

we need to live in community. And so Chong helps us with this connection, living in community. So um I already talked about that, you know , we cannot separate ourselves from God and it's really

00:34:44.540 - 00:34:55.420

the spirit that draws us to live in peace with one another. So I'm just kind of going over really quickly these terms, they're more in depth in the book. So you can just read more or

00:34:55.420 - 00:35:12.820

in articles. So the fourth term I want to cover is key. So who has heard of the word? She? Okay. Who has not heard of the word? She okay a few but I

00:35:12.820 - 00:35:34.900

am sure you have heard of it in other terms like Tai Chi Ray Ki or Qi Gong. Okay . So it may have permeated in different ways in our North American culture. But she, you know

00:35:34.900 - 00:35:47.560

, Japanese spell it K I or K apostrophe I Korean spell it K I two Chinese spell it C H I or C H apostrophe. I and you know Chinese, there's way more Chinese than Korean.

00:35:47.560 - 00:36:07.540

So I decided I'm just gonna spell it. Um Ch I because it's just a more popular way to spell key. So when we're talking about Kai, you know, in Christianity, we talk about the

00:36:07.540 - 00:36:19.990

spirit and we're very familiar with the spirit. And um yesterday, I in the group discussion, you know, a lot of things were discussed and someone said, Holy Spirit and I said, yeah,

00:36:20.000 - 00:36:32.570

so this is the same understanding, Holy Spirit or spirit. I tend to use spirit and I can explain that at another day. But she, you know, in the Bible, when it talks about

00:36:32.570 - 00:36:50.850

spirit, what is the Hebrew word for spirit? Ruah? Yeah. Someone said it so beautifully back there. And then what about in the New Testament ? Numa? So it was written in Hebrew as

00:36:50.850 - 00:37:07.100

Ruth and some scholars will say it's an automatic P A word who remembers what an automatic appeal word is ? Sounds like the word, right? So this wind gushing the Numa was written in Greek. And

00:37:07.100 - 00:37:24.520

then many of our theologians uh wrote in French or German. So what was a German word? Geist ? So I'm not, I don't, well, I don't speak but I'm not Jewish, I'm not

00:37:24.530 - 00:37:43.900

Greek, I'm not um German, I'm Korean. So that's why I use key because other people got to use their own words. And she is a helpful term because of this embodied sense of the spirit

00:37:45.600 - 00:38:00.410

. In Western Christianity, dualism have split mind and body. The body is here and the spirit is here, earth is here, heaven is here, man and woman logos and, and, and um

00:38:00.420 - 00:38:16.350

wisdom, we've separated it. So she helps us that the spirit of God is within us. And I think sometimes that's so missing in our theology, the spirit of God is within us. So if

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we use these four terms, um Han Chang and Yuri, it helps us to move towards a theology of visibility for those who are marginalized that we can see them because we're talking about our nous moodiness.

00:38:37.140 - 00:38:53.000

We're talking about the love that is inseparable between you and me. We're talking about the spirit in Joel 2 28. What does it say? Does anyone know that passage? Yeah, it's poured upon who

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all flesh. It's not just Presbyterians, it's all flesh. It's everyone, the spirit of God is already within us. And she, that word helps us to understand that the spirit of God is within

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us and in all living things. That's why climate care, environmental care is so important. That's the work of the church. That's what we need to do. So, and people are telling me to

00:39:30.660 - 00:39:46.060

wrap up. So this visibility of the Kingdom of God. I think it's so important because invisibility has no place within the Kingdom of God. And I know I was reminded that I have to talk about

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hope. Hope for me is so important. You know, hope is an anchor and hope is not this optimistic way of thinking. Hope is something that pushes you to act, to do some social justice

00:40:04.170 - 00:40:16.200

work, not sit there and just say okay, I'm gonna feel great today, but it hope means that you're going to do something about it. So I think this visibility, I'm I'm gonna share one

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story and then I'll end in my phd program. I had to take interfaith dialogue. The professor's name was Dr Avi Muhammed. Very short South Indian Man , Jesuit priest. And he asked the question,

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what does it say when we pray in the Lord's prayer? Let thy kingdom come as a kid. Growing up in London, Ontario, it was very protestant. We prayed the Lord's prayer every morning.

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Okay. Sunday shopping was out. All the stores were shut down. So I knew the Lord's prayer inside out. And in Korean, you know, I just knew it, but I was smart enough

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not to answer that question. Everybody's putting their hand up and he's saying no to everybody. This is a phd course, right? And he said, no, no, no, no, no,

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everybody got it wrong. And I just kept my head down. So he said, when we pray the Lord's prayer, let thy kingdom come. It means let my kingdom go. Yeah. And I

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think that's what we need to do. We build our little Kingdoms everywhere. But if we let that kingdom go and work towards a theology of visibility, how more peaceful and loving and hopeful will our churches